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I just spent almost 30 minutes wrestling with the infant car seat. Always a task master, I decided to tackle this while on hold with the insurance company to discuss questions regarding the “explanation of benefits” from my recent hospital stay. I loathe those EOBs don’t you? I hate when they list things generally and make you scratch your head wondering WHAT is this pharmacy charge for $1.14? There are some BIG issues with this hospital stay already in that the insurer and the hospital disagree on how to categorize my stay; observation or inpatient admission. I was most perplexed by the 10-minute ultrasound I had the morning after I was admitted that was listed as if it happened three separate times. And wow, that is really boring information to share, so onto the car seat wrestling match which I know isn’t all that more interesting, but what can I say… things aren’t too exciting around here lately.

It started with the Bundle Me. Ever since I brought home that snazzy Snap ‘N Go Caroline has been pushing the infant car seat around the house with her baby doll strapped in. She keeps a blanket in the basket to cover her when she is cold and moves the hood back and forth with expert maternal precision. I promised Steve the stroller would be folded flat and in the garage by the time he got home today, but how can I possibly take this novelty from my budding mommy? So with phone in hand, member ID entered into the system, hold music playing, I grabbed a hold of the fleecey warm Bundle Me and decided that I would just install it into the seat while I waited for what’s his name to retrieve my benefits information. I’m not just sitting here eating bon bons.

That’s when I realized that we had put this thing up in the attic in early 2008 and had not looked back. The straps were on the highest setting. The head support grimy and discolored and already in the washing machine. Three years ago I recall being completely perplexed by this seat. Changing the straps from one setting to the other the first time almost brought on a panic attack of epic proportions because my brain does not work in a mechanical way. I need directions and pictures and someone telling me I am doing it correctly to get through any installation or IKEA assembly.

I absolutely shocked myself by calmly moving the straps to the holes reserved for the tiniest of humans. Even when the straps ended up completely tangled and needed to be rethreaded after the Bundle Me was practically installed and ready to go, I had no issue.

Did I mention that what’s his name was still looking up my information?

Nearly thirty minutes later and after what’s his name had finally gotten back to me that all three of those ultrasounds were separate charges within the same ultrasound, I completed the Bundle Me installation and reattached the seat to the stroller frame. This second time around mom gig, it’s definitely different. Sure, it still took my thirty minutes, but I didn’t break a sweat. I wasn’t overwhelmed and we will avoid the crazy “how do we do this again?” discussion in the hospital when it comes time to pack Mac into his seat and drive him home. Home.

As of today, we’ve been prepping hard core for Macadamia’s arrival for exactly one month. A month ago I thought I was going to be having a pre-Christmas baby complete with extended NICU stay. A month ago I truly believed I would miss seeing Colleen and Greg dance their first dance. A month ago I woke up hoping it was all a bad dream and found myself attached to an IV pole and dumping pee into a container on ice. A month ago I would have given anything to make it to this day – to this week – and here we are. It’s been a hard month for us. There was a lot of running around like crazy people, many dust bunnies I tried to ignore but wasn’t able to, and there were silent prayers and tears that we would get through this storm and welcome our son safely into this world. He hasn’t made his debut yet, there is still much to be done to get him here physically (though I try NOT to think about labor), but we are so much more keenly aware of how lucky we are and how amazing life with him is going to be.

I have my weekly non-stress test this afternoon. I’m looking forward to hearing Macadamia’s galloping heart beat, even if I cannot feel it through his chest with my own hand just yet.


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