frustration

Things have taken a somewhat nasty turn. Our previously happy and amazing sleeper has done a complete and total 180 in the last week. We went from taking nice long naps in the papasan seat or the swing to only sleeping on people. The wee hours of the night feedings that used to end in a content and full baby returning to his crib have now become wide awake hours long stretches of singing, shhing, and bouncing, typically from 1-3am. The end result the last few days has been a baby in our bed snuggled in my arms. While the end result is a sleeping baby and a sleeping mommy – we aren't big believers in co-sleeping. In fact, I would much prefer that our bed be just that.

It isn't just the nights. During the day he is unsettled, unhappy, and requiring constant attention and jiggling. If Kiki were not here to take him I think I might already have lost my mind. It's hard watching him scream and fuss. I just want him to be ok. I just don't know how to make this better.

Last week I noticed some reddish streaks in his diaper that I can only assume were blood. I phoned the pedi immediately and they suggested I watch it, that perhaps it was a fissure of some kind. I was instructed to call back if I noticed CLUMPS of blood. A little research revealed that this kind of thing sometimes happens with oversupply – so we went BACK to the one side regimen AGAIN and since then no blood and things in the diaper arena seem to have returned to normal. Connor seemed happier too, but only for a short time.

He started having trouble getting back to his crib in the last few weeks after the late late/early early meal between 4 and 5 am. If he fussed I brought him into bed with us because too much fussing would wake Caroline up. Then slowly more often than not he was having trouble getting back to bed for the last stretch of the night and then it became a regular thing. He phased it out and then he phased out the middle of the night back to bed at around 1am. I literally place him on his back and he is WIDE awake. In fact, anytime I try to place him on his back he is unhappy and awake. Oddly enough his favorite place in the world is the changing table. Try to make sense out of that little mystery? I've tried putting him on his side, nothing seems to help him stay down. This is surely why he is not taking to crib naps during the day.

Since Saturday he has been a miserable sad boy more often than not. It is impossible to even guess what his day will be like. I know it would be astounding for him to be on a schedule at this point, but I should at least have a little map in my head of what his day will be like; when he might be getting tired after such and such a time. I have no idea. Each day is a mystery.

Of course as I sit here typing my frustrations he is wrapped in a blanket sleeping contentedly in his papasan seat. (45 minute snooze) Connor gives us occasional sunny moments when he'll kick his feet with vigor, smile, say ahgoo, and his eyes twinkle with such happiness that I can hardly remember how unhappy he was just moments ago. Caroline has her three year doctor's appointment today. I'm hoping I bring the unsettled version of Connor with me to see what the doctor suggests. Could it be reflux? Could those omnipresent hiccups be a sign of something? What's a mom to do?

4 comments:

  1. oh man...so sorry to hear that. at least he had the decency to wait until you were somewhat settled in MA to pull out the demon child within. they all have one...

    hope you're getting a little sleep here and there. thinking of you!

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  2. Ok...so this sort of thing happened to Addison too. I saw the blood in the dipe, and then it seemed to have gone away. Took her to the GI Specialist when I saw reflux qualities (hiccups, gas, fussy beyond fussy) that wasn't all about puke, he tested her poop and there was still TONS of blood in it (can't see to the eye). The outcome...allergy to the milk protein. He said more then 50% of babies are and that is what the usually call "colic" but it is not and can be easily fixed. Not sure if this is useful but thought I would share.

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  3. Hi Kerri,
    I was about to post almost the exact same comment as Aimee. Ryan never had blood in his stool (a more tell tale sign of milk protein intolerance) but he did have the fussiness. I cut out dairy and he is a new kid. Sucks for me (no pizza, cheeseburgers, ice cream, etc) but it's worth it!

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  4. Poor little man, and poor Mom. I hope things get figured out really soon and sleep is had by all.

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