I'm searching for a tiny red winter glove for Connor to bring back to school tomorrow. The boots are lined up, the task of lunchmaking awaits Steve and I. The holiday week flew by, just as it always does. Days anticipating the wonder of Christsmas, long days exploring new treasures, and days wondering aloud if there is school today and the joy in their tiny voices when we answer, "no!" Steve bore the brunt of the week, I had a few days off to tag team with him, some rushed work days when I just wanted to hurry up and be home.

It was a different kind of year. I always have such gratitude for this season, the magic of it all. This year with the palpable sadness in the world from disasters both natural and man-made, these children who smell like maple syrup and speak in high voices felt like gifts under the tree. There were momentary twinges of guilt; at church, on Christmas Eve after we tucked them in with sugar plums dancing in their heads, in the rush of Christmas morning, in the simple happiness of the days after, and just now.

We occasionally persue an elusive dream; the family nap. We look at each other across the lunch table and sensing meltdowns and a long never ending afternoon, give an eyebrow raise. Today was a day when it all came together. Connor tucked himself under my arm, Caroline against my shoulder, Steve behind her in a bear hug and we achieved a spectacular two plus hour nap. I woke up first, smelled my son's sweaty head, and felt the weight of Caroline against my back. I breathed it in, soaked in that quiet moment of perfection, and considered again those aching to feel the weight and smell the smells of their children. I promised a movie after our rest and in lieu of The Grinch or Prep & Landing or something seasonal, I put on Miracle. Connor is transfixed, Caroline is already onto Brooks that these boys don't play for anyone but USA and "WHY DON'T THESE BOYS GET IT?" She's trying to read over my shoulder and we are all together. It seems like a fitting way to start the New Year especially this year;  a true story of triumph, what the spirit can do if it wants something bad enough, good overcoming evil (ha), and we all need a little Miracle right now.


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